Week 8 - I am, I am not
I am falling behind this week. It isn't a huge problem but we all know what happens when we let things lag, catching up is hard work.
I try to embrace my slumps as much as I can but that doesn't keep the frustration at bay. I am not...wait, I need to turn this around.
I often overthink things which sometimes leaves me feeling overwhelmed.
I am slow and steady.
Once I find my starting point, things usually come together quickly.
Maybe messy beginnings allow me to reign in the essential or maybe that's the way it flows sometimes.
I am as confident as the next person which, from what I've understood. isn't as much as I should be.
I get things done.
I doubt. I try not to but I do. Mostly I doubt myself.
I am fairly trusting of people though I try to be cautious.
I trust my instincts, my intuition is rarely wrong, though I try to look at things from all perspectives.
I am easily distracted.
I have lots of ideas.
These ideas excite me.
I strive for optimism.
Living positively is as natural a high as they come!
And yet, occasionally I feel like I'm kidding myself.
I am made up of contradictions.
My energy fluctuates like teenage mood swings.
Sometimes all I want to do is stop;
To stop in front of the TV and binge for a day,
To escape between the pages of a good book,
To drink bottomless cups of tea,
To do anything except what I know I should be doing.
I am human.
No surprises there.
None of this makes any any sense or difference to anyone but me.
So in my long winded way I get to the point.
I find my way.
This weekend I didn't feel like doing anything.
I felt physically, emotionally and mentally lumpy.
Perhaps it is befitting that my succulent terrarium was made during a dry spell in the middle of a downpour.
Nothing like dipping your hands in good earthy energy and the promise of new life.
Succulent, from the Latin sucus meaning juice or sap, is one of my favourite words. It has a juicy feel in the mouth. It arouses the senses with culinary associations.
A lovely way to finish the week after feeling two-dimensional for most of it.
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For me, it seems there is not much difference between wondering and wandering. It has always helped me find inspiration. Creative dabbling is good for the soul, I couldn't imagine life without it and often surprise myself by what I come up with.